My heart is saying I don’t understand or accept or desire it enough to do it now. My brain just needs to figure out why. Stop looking for another reason more complex than ‘not wanting to do because you don’t want to do it.’ Sometimes you need to do crappy stuff in order to get want you want. You don’t have to like it…BUT if you want what you want then you gotta suck it up and do it. If that doesn’t work then maybe you need to think about that thing you think you want.